:: a certain peace ::

:: Wednesday, January 07, 2004 ::

so i've been toying around with another blog, a new blog. here it is. i'm changing it constantly right now, tweaking it up a bit. check it out and tell me what you thinkg...
:: Jasmine 1:18 PM [+] ::
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here's the photo of the bawk i promised, whaddya think?.
:: Jasmine 4:56 PM [+] ::
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i've done it. my first finished object of the new year! this weekend, i was introduced to the miracles held in a hot water bottle. i haven't been able to sleep well since my mom took ill. but my hot water bottle does the trick. it's only right that i knit my new companion a sweater to keep warm.

after some brief googling, i stumbled upon this BAWk thanks to Rachel of my glass house. i did a little remixing, changed the cable a bit and here you have my own bawk! i'll add pix later...

i am really procrastinating right now. i have been recently having anxiety attacks when it's time for me to leave my house and go to the hospital. my heart jumps in my throat and i run to find something, anything to keep me from leaving the house. i really should be there by now but it's so hard to know that i am going to have to leave the hospital again and my mom will still be there....
:: Jasmine 1:45 PM [+] ::
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Happy New Year to one and all. i haven't really been in the posting mood in the past few weeks since my mom is really ill, but then again i could probably need a place where i can vent on a dail basis--whether or not anyone is actually listening. i must admit, that throughout it all, i keep on knitting.

it is 3 weeks today since my mom has been in the hospital. she suffered a massive heart attack on dec. 14. she is still trying to recover from the triple bypass sugery on the 16th that didn't really work and now she is going to need a heart transplant. i found out this morning that she has pneumonia, yet another complication, but she's still fighting and that's all i hope for.

i know that you are not thrown anything that you can't handle but i sometimes stop and wonder exactly how well am i handling this? i have always been able to switch on the auto pilot to make it through times of crisis but this is definitely going to be a long process.

today was my first day back at the restaurant, well sort of. i came in and set up for brunch but didn't actually work. brunch at that restaurant is exceptionally grueling i am not really in the frame of mind to be overly considerate to a bunch of self-absorbed, arrogant, extremely rich & demanding people. they may end up wearing their mimosa and eggs benedict, if they say the wrong thing.

so instead of work, i travel 90 minutes each way to my mom's hospital and stay there for 5 hours.i try to speak with at least one of her doctors ( she has a team of about 5 or so different specialists) every day and then i sit and talk to her, let her know that i love her and how beautiful she is....once she is a little more stable i'll feel more comfortable going back to work, but it's just too soon. i can't afford to do anything but knit as my ipod is currently not working and i have a very big stash.


:: Jasmine 12:38 PM [+] ::
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now that fall is here, i am beginning to knit for all my friends. granted, i am not doing the crazy holiday knit for everyone psychosis that seems to ensnare most knitters i know. i just like making gifts for my friends without the pressure of holidays. so at some point during the fall most of my friends receive something made by me, whether it's a bedazzled something or other, a knitted object or a bath and & beauty product is yet to be determined but for all intents & purposes, it will be a warm fuzzy from me...
:: Jasmine 12:33 PM [+] ::
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i am so happy to announce that i have the new rebecca and I've already found about three projects in there that i would love to do! tonight is the first tuesday in at least 6 weeks that i will be able to go the stitch n bitch. i've got some much finished stuff to show...my lanscape shawl and my sweater...
i'm getting tattooed today! i am very excited the closer i get to finishing this project, the happier i become....i'm about to make the shrug in the new rebecca out of a bright blue kureyon coloray, what joy!
:: Jasmine 11:45 AM [+] ::
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